And So This Is Trismus

Good Morning

One of the consolations of my ordeal is that it affords the opportunity of widening my vocabulary, as I learn new medical terms. The word for today is Trismus, which means the inability to open the mouth, or - in technical terms - limited mandibular motion.

So, to add to all my other ailments, I am suffering from Trismus. It probably originated with the surgery, and would have been exacerbated by radiotherapy. In order to ease the condition, Speech and Language Therapist Nancy has obtained an instrument of torture called a TheraBite, which is a plastic contraption designed to widen the mouth opening.

The TheraByte resembles a Dymo tapewriter in appearance, but works on a simple principle of stretching the jaw muscles, so that eventually with repeated use the patent's natural jaw opening increases to a satisfactory extent. My mouth currently opens less than 2cm, and the objective is to get a gap of over 3.5cm.

Still, regardless of the Trismus, my recovery continues, and I'm feeling progressively stronger. You will recall that my main worry has been about my long-term ability to eat and drink normally, and so I've decided to up the ante as far as my consumption of food and drink is concerned.

Until very recently, I've been limiting myself to cautious sips of water and not much more, but I was alarmed at my previous meeting with Nancy, when she indicated that I may be limited to soft foods in perpetuity. I wasn't prepared to accept a life of eating nothing but mush, so consulted others.

You may remember that a nice chap called Ben, who went through similar surgery and treatment to myself a couple of years ago, had made contact when I was in hospital, and he has continued to offer moral support since then. He had such difficulty rehabilitating his ability to swallow that he travelled to the States for treatment at the Swallowing Research Laboratory at the University of Florida. He kept a video diary of his time there, and put it on YouTube: I found it quite inspiring. I've also been in touch with Doctor Michael Crary, who attended to Ben, and he has given me some useful advice. I'm hoping that I won't have to travel to Florida to put things right, but if that's what it takes, that's what I'll do.

In the meantime, the advice from Ben and Dr Crary (and, in fairness, my own Speech and Language Therapist, Nancy) is to practice swallowing as much as possible. With regard to eating, I've therefore decided to up the ante, and be less Gillian McKeith and more Linford Christie. In the last few days, I have devoured yogurts, jellies, chocolate mousses, Creme Caramels, and even a banana mashed up in custard. No kangaroo penises yet, but it's early days.

I've also ventured so far as to try a few tastes of alcoholic drinks. All of the wines I've tried have been too acidic for my radiation-impaired palate, but I was able to cope with a small glass of beer. I'm still intending to have that glass of Champagne on Christmas day!

Things generally continue to progress, although not as rapidly as I'd like. I'm feeling much stronger, and my spirits have improved enormously. The doctor has said that I can dip my toe back in the water of work, albeit only from home to begin with. So everything is good!

Here are 10 songs about food.

1. Life Is A Minestrone - 10CC
2. Eggs And Coffee - Tom Waits
3. Jambalaya - Hank Williams
4. Breakfast In Bed - Sheila Hylton
5. Green Onions - Booker T & The MGs
6. Memphis Soul Stew - King Curtis
7. Mummy I Don't Like My Meat - The Goodies
8. Breakfast - Alan Hull
9. Cat Food - King Crimson
10. Meat Is Murder - The Smiths

Mouth wide shut.

RP